Still working through writer’s obstruction. It’s not even a matter of inability to write something, or get a particular phrase right. It’s the absolute lack of desire to participate in the process at this point.
It feels like writer’s rebellion. My creativity is throwing a tantrum, my ability to write is telling me “Screw you, I want to read, not write.”
My brain is currently in absorption mode. I’m reading old blog posts, I’m reading good books, I’m reading news stories, I’m watching movies, I’m having conversations with kids and adults, and I’m busy with work.
Sometimes lately, I feel like I’ve been spent, or that I’m accumulating blog fodder for the leaner months ahead. Other times, I just feel like blogging is a giant pain in the butt.
But I feel like skipping a day would be admitting failure. That it would be one more in the long list of things I’ve not followed up on, things I’ve let defeat me, things I’ve turned into a giant disappointment.
This writing thing: it is the only resolution I’ve really ever kept. I love that people read here, but mostly, this is for me. This is to prove to myself that I can stick with it, that I can keep going. I think it’s like when long-distance runners hit that wall and then push through and keep going.
I say you JUST read. Write stuff in “draft” and save for later if you feel the need to keep that resolution. I think that part of being creative is finding creative ways around the wall.
I have not made time to read/learn in quite some time and I’m quite irritated with myself for it.
I stumbled upon your blog, truthfully I don’t know how. But I just wanted to thank you for all your posts and let you know how much I enjoy reading them. For selfish reasons, I think you should keep that resolution. However, I’d understand completely, if you didn’t. I don’t think I’ve ever kept a resolution for longer than a month!
I’d say, keep the posts coming, keep the chain alive, but when you don’t feel like entertaining us, when you don’t have anything to say, just post a one-sentence entry. Take the pressure off yourself.
it’s called july, and it makes everyone want to eat over the sink, and forgo showers.
now, i think i’ll go pick up lonesome dove.
You have so eloquently captured the place I’ve been for the last six months. Keep writing, even if it’s just a sentence. :)